January 2013
1 post
4 tags
No Excuses
Another brand spanking new year is upon us. If you’re like most rational minded people (okay, I’m giving myself too much credit) chances are you’ve avoided anything even remotely resembling a resolution like the plague. They never work. You’ve also inwardly rolled your eyes at friends who get excited for a “fresh start.” Because, honestly, why do you need the...
November 2012
9 posts
3 tags
Here Comes 30
I’ve had anxiety about turning 30 for a few years, starting at age 27. I worried that I wouldn’t have the things I was “supposed” to have at that age or that I wouldn’t have the experience that I was supposed to have. I worried that I was going to have to start acting a way I didn’t feel. That I would feel guilty for where I was “at” when the big 3-0...
4 tags
Is It Right For You?
It occurred to me today that too often we either approve or disapprove of behavior with the subconscious question, “Is it right for the group?” If you asked an anthropologist why we do this, they might tell you that an ancient, primordial, part of our brain is still attached to those first days of humans. The time when we were nomads and the survival of the group meant the survival of...
3 tags
Have Compassion
I dabble in the motivational post now and again on this blog (okay, like most of the posts are of that vein). I’m not going to lie, those posts are as much pep talks to myself as they are to anyone willing to read. I take some little life lesson I’ve learned, distill it down to its most basic principle and then write it down so that I can commit it to memory and have a record of it....
The Moral of The Previous Post
I’m not entirely sure why this idea of feigning interest in another person’s life persists. That doesn’t mean that we need to be rude or hurtful, of course, just that we don’t have to pretend. Each of us deserves our own specially curated community of supporters and intellectual equals, and that is perhaps what the value of social media on a personal level really offers.
...
3 tags
To Facebook or Not To Facebook
I was having dinner with my mother on Saturday night and for lack of anything else to say I blurted out “I’m thinking of getting off Facebook.” Of course she asked why, she’s an avid, happy, user herself. I explained, you know, some shit about being tired of asshat statuses lauding mediocrity and the status quo. Her response: you care too much about other people’s...
“Being self-confident is easy — as long as you do exactly what everyone...”
– Anon
2 tags
What's Your Locus?
I was on the phone last week with a newfound creative friend (we bonded over this similarity), talking about the value of different degrees. I confessed that now I have a clearly chosen career path, I wonder if I wouldn’t have been more successful at it sooner if I had studied english, journalism, or literature. As I’ve learned more about this industry, I’ve found out there are...
7 tags
Sometimes More Is More
I did it. I separated this blog into two. Over the years two very distinct subject matters have emerged. Those relating to my personal life experience, drawing “lessons” from them and sharing, and then slap-dash political/social/cultural commentary. It occurred to me to separate them several weeks ago, as it would be easier to share each subject as I saw fit with different clients...
The Case for Going Hard
I just read this fantastically inspirational article by a blogger named John Morrow. In it, he tells his story about how he came to accomplish the things he has (transforming himself into a highly paid blogger) and not only encourages but promises that anyone else can do it. Now part of his high income is his coaching, so clearly he’s going to be good at convincing you that you can achieve...
October 2012
5 posts
My Work isn't "My Work"
Okay. I was in an email conversation recently and the person I was speaking with asked how “it all” was going. I responded as honestly as I could. That “it” was going well. I spent the last year working on my portfolio, learning the industry, and am confident things will essentially go according to plan — that is that I will one day be a self-sustaining writer with a...
4 tags
What Have You Done Lately?
One thing has been on my mind lately, and by lately I mean it has traveled in and out of my thoughts for a solid year. I like to think of the phenomenon as “Oh, this old thing?” Who doesn’t know of the cliched response women make to one another after a compliment that displays fake humility while at the same time attempting to garner jealousy in the person it’s directed...
6 tags
City of Light
There is a reason why they say Paris is the place to “find yourself.” Being part of a culture that reveres artistry, creativity, solitude, contemplation and spending hours sitting by oneself sipping coffee at a cafe constitutes the exact recipe for self discovery. It’s about being alone. Paris just happens to be a stunningly, charmingly, beautiful place to be by yourself.
I...
4 tags
Give Up The Act (This is A Long One)
The longer I live, the more I realize how true so many aphorisms and cliches are. One that I keep coming back to over and over again is “the truth will set you free.”
I’m going to be frank here, without mentioning any names, should the people I refer to read this they will probably know who they are and not be at all pleased with me. But it’s okay, because it would be...
September 2012
6 posts
2 tags
Less Is More
Hey,
Do you want to know how you end up not achieving your wildest dreams? You accept less.
It’s that simple. No more complicated than that, with one caveat: the times when “less” is more. When is that?
When you turn down the stable job (provided you’re able to) you DON’T want to keep fighting another day for the job you do.
7 tags
If You Want to Save Yourself...
You’re going to get a lot of advice in your lifetime. You’re going to hear all about what you should and shouldn’t do and who you should avoid and who you should ingratiate yourself with. And most of it you will not listen to.
Very few people take the time to sit back and think about the quality of their community, whether or not they’re being treated well by alleged...
3 tags
Simply The Best
One of my philosophical obsessions since my early twenties has been the following questions: does everything happen “for the best?” and does it all happen “for a reason?” Of course in today’s secular society such a notion seems antiquated and a little too quaint. And one can’t forget that hindsight is 20/20. One of my former roommates liked to say when...
4 tags
Life Is Just Too Damn PRECIOUS Not to Do What's...
No content for this post. The title is it.
11 tags
I Don't Have to Be Your Virgin, I Don't Have to Be...
In general, according to my pop knowledge, I find feminism to be an overwrought and over-thought excuse for women to bond with each other. It’s like rent Sleepless in Seattle, eat some chocolate and get over it. I also believe that many ideals of 70s feminism are antiquated and have shown themselves to be simply impractical.
Overall, like all social movements, the originators may have...
August 2012
5 posts
4 tags
Sex And The City
SATC, the show, debuted in I think ‘99 or 2000. A time at which I was just coming in to adolescence. And oh my God, here was the embodiment of everything I wanted to be when I grew up. Stylish, independent, living in an address coveted by millions, drinking pink martinis with my besties. I dutifully watched every episode from the second season to the end, fantasizing through those 30...
No. is a compete sentence
The Olsen’s put it on a T Shirt, so it must be true. No, seriously. It is true. If something doesn’t feel quite right, steer clear, make no apologies. If something feels completely right, do it, regardless of what other people will tell you about it that makes it seem wrong. Trust your instincts. Don’t apologize for them.
4 tags
Give Yourself Permission
One of the most important realizations of the last year of my life, this whole “who am I?” late-twenties deal that I’m sure so many young people in my generation are struggling through, has been that at a certain point in time, in order to move forward, you’ve got to give yourself permission to be selfish. You have to not let someone oblige you to spend time in a way that...
26 Successful People Who Failed at First →
4 tags
On Aging and the Growth of Self Knowledge
When we’re young we’re essentially given the idea that we don’t know what’s good for us. And that adults do. Yes, this is basically true. But it also plants a seed of self doubt in which we look to authority figures to tell us how to go about living our lives. From our parents to know-it-all friends to therapists, we crave someone else’s answers to our problems.
...
July 2012
3 posts
3 tags
Fu**ing Journalism
I have a confession to make. I didn’t go to journalism school. So I apologize if anything in this post is irrelevant due to a lack of formal knowledge about the craft of conducting research, interviewing experts, and impartially sharing what you find with the world in an effort to keep people engaged and informed. What’s that you say? Judging today’s articles in some of the...
Get Real
Pinterest is a fantasy world that I allow myself to escape to often. I run two Pinterest pages (mine and Papierdoll’s) and a dozen boards. I have no idea how the girls with 72 boards on one page and 63,000 pins do it. Except maybe they’re all 14 y/o’s? Eh Whatever.
One thing I love that I often see are short quotes about life and following your dreams and the value of being...
4 tags
Doing The Right Thing
Yesterday I posted (i.e. “worked”) from the couch. The Food Network had some kind of all day marathon of my favorite show: Chopped, which I had on mute through each episode. Since I’ve come home and been re-indoctrinated to the world of television I’ve found myself with an affinity for reality competition shows. Why? Because while I hate that a network will pick a reality...
June 2012
4 posts
4 tags
I'm Not Sorry
This is an open letter I’ve been wanting to write for a few weeks. I hesitate to say that it’s a letter to “haters.” It’s more like a letter to…well…everyone. Here goes…
Dear Everyone,
I. Am. Not. Sorry. I don’t feel bad that I’m awesome. I don’t feel bad that I have blond hair and blue eyes and large ta tas. I’m not...
To You Average, I Say NO!
I have turned down, and quit, maybe slightly fewer writing jobs than I have been offered, which is to say a fair amount. In the beginning I was just so happy someone wanted to work with me that I’d do anything. For virtually any fee. And that’s the way it should be. You should be open to making a buck for your creative efforts, even if it’s just a buck, when you’re...
Expect To Be Your Own Caped Crusader
In my mind, we should always encourage each other to follow our dreams and creative urges. Not only is this good for the soul, it’s good for the economy. Here’s the reality:
People don’t encourage each other often enough. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve sent “hey, update about my work!” emails to friends and family to only get one or two genuine...
I Found This
on the Internet. And found that it was pretty darn true.
May 2012
14 posts
On Education
Forbes lists my hometown as the fourth smartest city in the country. When I lived in New York, I would meet people who after a conversation would repeat “you’re so smart! How do you know that!?” One person, a writer, told me once, “you talk in paragraphs.” (I realized upon re-reading this first para may sound self-indulgent; however it’s meant to convey that...
Give Yourself
To the muse. I like it when people share stories of their struggles. It makes me feel connected to them and the rest of the world. It let’s me know that it isn’t berries and cream for everyone, or anyone, all the time. I like it when it takes someone a long time to reach the level of success they’re after. In that sprit, allow me to share with you.
When I was growing up, I...
Oh, Grow Up
I’ve been thinking for the last couple of years of the cultural shifts that are happening in American society. Some of them blatantly obvious to the initiated, but many are not. The reason being that these shifts are happening faster than any major mindset change has ever happened (or I believe so anyway). Just a couple of years — rather than an entire generation — is a line of...
Ode To The Quasawwwwn (orig. June 2009)
This morning I saw you in the glass starbucks case, and your golden, buttery exterior caught my eye. You looked fresh, which peaked my interest, stacked there amongst your comrades.
What did I want today? Were you on the list? No. But you took me by surprise. You don’t have the brown promise of chocolate, or the blue distinction of embedded fruit. Neither do you have red ribbons of...
Recessionista
Beth: Did you hear what happened to Peanut Butter!?
me: no
Beth: You can’t have it!
me: Why?
Beth: Salmonella
me: (eye roll) Whatever, everything has something in it that can kill you. I’m not going to stop eating peanut butter.
Beth: I know, me neither. I just bought a new jar and I DO NOT have that kind of money to throw away.
The Office (orig. July 2009)
Shortly after I got in this morning one of my cube mates excitedly called my name. Since he can’t stand his job and is an artist during his off hours who finds himself too good for the menial tasks he’s agreed to perform, and doesn’t usually talk to coworkers, I was surprised.
After I went over to him, he proceeded to show me a large, and hopefully dead cockroach that...
1 tag
From One Blog to Another
A friend of mine sent me a cool note from the blogosphere that I feel compelled to quote and share a link to. I have no idea who wrote it originally, or else I would sing his praises. For now it’ll have to be sufficient to say that I did not write it. And I hope you enjoy.
Here’s my favorite part: Date a girl who doesn’t read because the girl who reads knows the importance of plot....
3 tags
Change Is Good
I was just sitting, well I am right now, on my couch wondering about two schools of thought. The first is the general idea that you are “who you are”, you can’t hide it, you can’t fake it and so you might as well be it to the fullest. Who you are is not only great, no matter what, but it’s who you were “meant” to be. Then there’s the other school....
3 tags
Peanuts and Cracker Jacks (orig. April 2011)
Once every couple of weeks a nice guy I work with comes in to the office. I think he’s actually supposed to be here a couple of times per week, and somehow works it out to come in like twice a month.
Perhaps it’s his scarcity or just his winning personality but when he’s here, several other guys in my office flock to his cubicle like baptists to a river. On the one hand, I...
3 tags
Crescendo (original post November 2011)
The second movement (Allegretto) of Beethoven’s 7th symphony is my favorite. Not my favorite piece of music or my favorite piece of instrumental music. Not my favorite symphony or a product of my favorite composer. It’s just my favorite.
When I was little it was hard for me to get to sleep at night sometimes. If you’ve ever seen the movie “What About Bob?” and...
4 tags
What Turns You On?
I mean to ask the title question of this post in exactly the way you’re thinking. What turns you on? Because I believe that love and passion and excitement, even bordering on the erotic, is one of our compasses for our life’s work.
Tonight I was watching The Next Iron Chef and one of the last contenders was working with a very expensive slab of beef. While he was cutting it up he...
4 tags
Is Everyone Doing What They Love?
The answer to this question is: a lot more than you think. I’ve talked before about growing up in the Midwest, in a suburban haven of safe productivity, of success defined by landing an “office” job. But as I keep working toward my goal, however much I’m stabbing in the dark—and I am, I’m realizing that surrounding me everywhere are the products of...
Who You Are
It’s interesting when you’re younger to hear older people say things about self acceptance coming with age, loving yourself as you become more comfortable in your own skin. As a young person, trying to fit in, it barely registers. It’s almost as if it’s spoken in a different language. But as I’ve become older, I’ve come to realize how true it is.
I was a...
April 2012
4 posts
5 tags
Form Vs. Content
I’m trying to think of this amazingly talented, articulate way to say that posers care about content before they try to grasp their form; when in reality it should be exactly the opposite. Content will come. Writers, write. Sculptors, sculpt. Entrepreneurs, entrepreneur. Singers, sing. Rabbis, read. Priests, pray. Designers, sketch, dress. Professors, preach. The form comes first and then...
1 tag
Don't Force It.
I’m trying a new experiment in my life. I’m trading the idea of reckless and unlimited ambition with DIYP (Do It At Your Own Pace) ambition. I grew up watching the American media worship the wunderkind. I have always wanted to be a prodigy. So bad. I drooled, like everyone else, over the 25 y/o billionaire or the 22-year-old A-list movie star on the cover of Vogue. I was so impressed,...
3 tags
Live Like You've Got All The Time In The World
An idea came to me last night. I think it was fostered by reading a blog a few weeks ago run by a guy who says it’s better to have no goals at all, no “plan” in life, but to just do your thing every day and live. I didn’t think long or hard about it at the time. But it probably has been festering in my sub-conscious ever since.
What an idea…what an unbelievably...
